In Memory of our dear departed friends
My precious Ayla left this world yesterday (8/24/04) - her spirit ascending joyfully on a sunbeam that suddenly opened up through the dark clouds at the moment of her death. Over the weekend I decided to use the kinesiology technique to ask her if it was her time for death. Without doubt she answered affirmatively. I promised that Monday would be the day so she (and I) could prepare. Early Monday morning I called my vet, leaving a message with the already frantic receptionist to have one of the vets return my call as soon as possible. An hour later I still hadn't heard from them, so I called them back only to find the office knee deep in an emergency. Each time I looked into Ayla's eyes, growing cloudier by the minute, my heart sank - so important was it for me to keep my word with this beloved fourteen year old angel. She lay down near my feet in my office, her black coat shiny from the early morning brushing I gave her. Her breathing was labored, as if a heavy object was resting on her thin chest. So, I called my equine vet, hoping she could come out and help us. She, too, was busy with an emergency colic. Then I thought of Janet's vet, Little Liedblad, over at the Broken Top Veterinary hospital on Highway 20. Linda, her receptionist and someone I know, told me Little was in surgery most of the day. My heart nearly sank. again. And, she kindly added, she would check with Little and get back to me. Another hour went by. Ayla waited patiently at my feet luxuriating in Roscoe's constant grooming with his wet tongue. This loving grooming exchange is something these two old friends have been doing for over twelve years. For most of the day Ayla's black head was glossy as if saturated with sacred oil, as Roscoe performed their ritual more than I have ever observed in the past. It was as if he knew she was leaving soon, so he wanted to make sure she was radiant for her journey. Linda called, thankfully, with the good news that Little would come by the house later in the afternoon. Initially I found myself pacing uncomfortably, impatiently, wanting the whole thing to be over with. I looked down at Ayla, asleep on the Indian rug in my office. And then that inner voice came, as it always does, reminding me all is in Divine Right Order.reminding me to listen to what was needed now, if anything, in the four hours we would wait for the vet to arrive. Ayla lifted her head slightly and looked up at me, blinking slowly, as if to say, "not to worry ... relax and allow ... it is all working just fine."
What can I say about my lovingly supportive friend Janet, who came over and sat with us, reading from "What We Can All Learn from Dogs"? The laughter was genuine. I was grateful for it - and her. And, it helped pass the time perfectly. When Little arrived we were waiting for her outside my office, Ayla's pillow ready to receive her. Little's kind and gentle demeanor, from her soft voice to the tender way she gave the first shot, to calm Ayla, affirmed how perfect this woman was - here to perform an emotionally difficult mission. I was sitting next to Ayla, stroking her head, telling her what was going to happen, making sure she was okay with everything. When it was time for the next shot, the one that would stop her heart, I noticed Roscoe back again, licking Ayla's back and rump. Wait! Wait! I am not finished yet. I missed that spot. Little shaved a bit of her right leg, placed the tourniquet around her elbow and injected the needle into the vein. The chemicals are designed to work very rapidly. Like Isis, however, Ayla's heart was strong. Let go, my precious Ayla ... let go and fly ... high ... let go. As Little injected a bit more of the drug, I realized Ayla may have needed to hear that I was all right that she was going. In that moment, the dark clouds in the western, here with us all day, parted widely, allowing a shaft of warm sunlight to fall on her face. Her spirit left her body in that moment, ascending up into the sky on the sunbeam.
After Little left, Janet and I sat next to Ayla's lifeless body. In order to give her soul time to completely leave her body we were waiting for three hours before burying her in the hole lovingly dug by Forrest with his trusty green tractor several days ago. I draped a white towel over her to keep the flies away. A few minutes later Roscoe came over and dug around a bit on the towel, as if to ask "are you still in there?" Without hesitation he laid down on her body, where he stayed for the three hours. She had been there when he arrived into our lives twelve years ago. Seems it was just that he wanted a bit more time with his old friend.
With love and deep gratitude for our animal teachers everywhere ...
The contents of this site are copyright © 2000-2013, Katherine Carter. All Rights Reserved.
WebMaster by Keith's Web-Stuff.org
View other Stuff by Keith's Web-Stuff